The Late Night Life Ponderer

A good friend of mine once told me, "What happens in the dark, comes out in the light."

I never saw that friend again but I think back on what people teach me and I try and learn from it.

My heart hurts for all of the pretty souls of the world searching for peace.

lights.

what happens to us as we grow old?
why do our parents only talk to their siblings when they have to?
how come anxiety and depression pills are the cure to life?

i'm scared of the future.
i'm scared that my siblings and nephews won't have a change at an innocent world.
i'm scared we will die from too many disasters.
i'm scared?

i know that i can be happy with all the love we have for each other.
i am sure that there are enough beautiful souls left to cure all of the rotten ones.

sometimes i go on not making sense.
other times i try and make sense of it.

odd hours.

lately my life has been strange.
i stay up far too late and sleep far too long.
i am obsessed with justin bieber's voice.
i have dreams where i can't open my eyes.
i spend my first time in ikea and eat ikea food.
i eat multiple chipotle burritos like an addict.
i love with my heart.
i dance with my feet.
i laugh with my mouth.
i live... in some sort of fashion.

i can't express myself in a pretty way.

the greatest quality to have in this lifetime is knowing how to say good bye to the people you love while keeping composure.

maybe getting choked up, crying, and sobbing show how much these people mean to you and how much you have taken them for granted during their time with you.

i find myself clinging on to memories of times way back when. those were the moments when i rolled down hills, leaped into fall leaves, kissed my mother on the lips, and cried for my dad who lived too far away.

now i find myself stuck and debating life. remembering the goals i had for myself to graduate college and be successful.

when i think back to my time in college, i only remember sadness and wanting to be with everyone i loved. i don't think i could leave again.

the greatest quality to have in this lifetime is knowing how to be with the people you love without ever having to say good bye.